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Politics

Trump: ‘I Am A Very Stupid Human Being’

WASHINGTON—Responding to a damning ‘Washington Post’ report alleging he had shared highly classified information with Russian officials, President Donald Trump addressed the concerns of the press, his fellow government officials, and the public at large Tuesday by announcing that he was an incredibly stupid human being.

Escalating Tensions Lead Trump To Shake Up Inner Circle Of TV Programs

WASHINGTON—Saying the decision arose out of the necessity to weed out certain key members whose values no longer aligned with the president’s, White House spokesman Sean Spicer told reporters Thursday that escalating tensions have led President Trump to shake up his inner circle of television programs.

Bill O’Reilly Tearfully Packs Up Framed Up-Skirt Photos From Desk

NEW YORK—Smiling wistfully as he gazed at the cherished mementos that had sat on his desk for much of the past 20 years, former Fox News commentator Bill O’Reilly reportedly grew teary-eyed Thursday as he packed up the framed up-skirt photos from his work space following his termination by the cable channel.
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New Job Posting On Craigslist Clearly For Secretary Of The Interior

WASHINGTON, DC—Despite the lack of denial or confirmation from the White House, a job posting in the "admin/office" section of the Washington Craigslist site strongly suggests the Cabinet–level post of Interior Secretary. "WANTED: TEAM PLAYER WILLING TO GO AGAINST THE TIDE—FAMILIARITY WITH NATIONAL PARKS A PLUS," read the listing. "Position involves interaction with lumber- and oil-company executives, Smokey Bear, President of United States of America, and may involve occasional outdoor work. Lotus Notes and WordPerfect a plus." In 2005, President Bush and Congress were criticized for hiring Jim Nicholson, the Secretary Of Veterans' Affairs, after it was revealed that Nicholson answered a classified advertisement in the back of Soldier Of Fortune magazine.

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Escalating Tensions Lead Trump To Shake Up Inner Circle Of TV Programs

WASHINGTON—Saying the decision arose out of the necessity to weed out certain key members whose values no longer aligned with the president’s, White House spokesman Sean Spicer told reporters Thursday that escalating tensions have led President Trump to shake up his inner circle of television programs.

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