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Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.
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New NASCAR Rules Change Designed To Cut Down On Constant Honking

DAYTONA BEACH, FL—NASCAR's rules committee unveiled a new set of regulations Thursday specifically aimed at reducing the incessant horn-honking heard throughout the Sprint Cup Series. "By penalizing excessive and pointless honks, we'll be cutting out almost 80 percent of the noise pollution from our races," said NASCAR chairman and CEO Brian France, adding that for several years stock-car racing has been losing fans due to the annoying car-horn racket. "Drivers may only honk their horns if a car is in their way or if they get cut off, but they are expressly prohibited from honking when they're just plain frustrated. Not only that, but caution laps run under yellow flags will be strictly honk-free, with violations punishable by a $200 fine." Though the issue was not raised during the offseason, France later implied that NASCAR would take action against drivers who slow down gradually in front of other drivers just to aggravate them.

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