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New NFL Rule Will Force Players To Have One Of Three Appropriate Haircuts

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Kevin Durant Wins Gold In Men’s Individual Basketball

RIO DE JANEIRO—Beating out Serbian Nikola Jokic by .87 points in order to claim the all-around title, U.S. forward Kevin Durant won Olympic gold Friday in men’s individual basketball, becoming the first man to win consecutive golds in the competition since Gary Payton at the 1996 and 2000 Games.

Michael Phelps Spots Estranged Father Poseidon In Stands

RIO DE JANEIRO—Immediately recognizing the booming, thunderous voice he hadn’t heard since he was 5 years old as he warmed up ahead of his first heat in the 200-meter individual medley, U.S. Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps reportedly spotted his long-estranged father, Poseidon, God of the Sea, cheering for him Thursday in the stands of the Olympic Aquatics Stadium.
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New NFL Rule Will Force Players To Have One Of Three Appropriate Haircuts

NEW YORK—Hoping to address the issue of long hair obscuring players' names and numbers, NFL owners passed a new rule wherein players would be restricted to one of three league-approved hairstyles. "People don't come to games to watch tufts of hair make tackles and score touchdowns; they come to watch the colorful uniforms do it," said 49ers coach Mike Nolan of the new rule, which will limit players to No. 2 grade buzz cuts, No. 1 grade "high-and-tight" cuts, and Johnny Unitas-style flattops. "These three haircuts embody the class, dignity, and discipline that has always been associated with NFL football players. Frankly, I thought three was too many; buzz cuts hint at a sense of individuality that has absolutely no place in football." NFL owners will next vote on a rule proposal that would strike names from players' uniforms, contracts, and birth certificates.

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