New Prescription Fish Tank Eliminates Need For Glasses While Looking At Fish

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Vol 45 Issue 21

Archie To Choose Betty Or Veronica

After nearly 68 years, a grown-up Archie Andrews will ask either Betty or Veronica for her hand in marriage in an upcoming issue of his eponymous...

Guantánamo Closure Delayed

By a margin of 90-6, the Senate voted down funding to relocate the 240 inmates being held at Guantánamo Bay to facilities on American soil....
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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FIFA Frantically Announces 2015 Summer World Cup In United States

ZURICH—After the Justice Department indicted numerous executives from world soccer’s governing body on charges of corruption and bribery, frantic and visibly nervous officials from FIFA held an impromptu press conference Wednesday to announce that the United States has been selected to host this summer’s 2015 World Cup.

New Prescription Fish Tank Eliminates Need For Glasses While Looking At Fish

SAGINAW, MI—Executives at Poseidon Aquatic Enclosures announced Monday the launch of a new line of made-to-order fish tanks that can be outfitted with customers' individual vision prescriptions. "How many times have you misplaced your eyeglasses yet still wanted to look at your fish?" company spokesperson Ian Barnes said of the new corrective tanks, which are available in sizes up to 100 gallons. "Never again with the new IchthyOptic System. Whether you have a slight astigmatism or need a bifocal tank to simultaneously look at your tiny gobies and large plecostomus, Poseidon can provide you with a crystal-clear fish-viewing solution." Barnes said the company is also developing a line of fish tanks that will incorporate Transitions-brand automatic tinting technology, which will eliminate glare when looking at fish outside on sunny days.

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