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Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

Infographic: 20 Years Of Netflix

Netflix was founded as an online DVD rental service in 1997 and has since evolved into a subscription-based streaming platform with its own slate of original programming. The Onion looks back at the most important moments in the company’s 20-year history.

Musical The Kind With Number About Putting On A Show

TALLAHASSEE, FL—Noting the increasingly animated choreography and behavior of the characters on stage, sources at the Tallahassee Community Theatre reported Friday that this is apparently the kind of musical with a big number about putting on a show.

What To Watch For In The New Obi-Wan Kenobi Film

Disney has announced they are in the early stages of developing a stand-alone ‘Star Wars’ film focused on the adventures of Jedi master Obi-Wan Kenobi. Here’s what fans can expect to see in the upcoming release.
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New Robert Altman Film Released Straight To Special-Edition Director's-Cut DVD

HOLLYWOOD, CA—Super Sunday, the latest film from acclaimed director Robert Altman, will be released straight to special collector's-edition director's-cut DVD, Daily Variety reported Monday. The film, which follows the parallel stories of 14 separate Super Bowl parties in different parts of the country, is slated to hit video stores Nov. 30. "Altman buffs rejoice: This never-before-seen director's cut features 77 minutes of additional footage not included in the theatrical non-release," Criterion Collection spokesman Tim Page said. "Also included are special commentary tracks from Altman, screenwriter Anne Rapp, and some of the film's stars, including Julianne Moore, Tim Roth, Lili Taylor, Matthew Modine, Michael Murphy, Bob Balaban, Martin Mull, Henry Gibson, Teri Garr, Jeff Goldblum, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Danny Aiello, Robert Downey Jr., Ned Beatty, and Lyle Lovett."

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