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What To Watch For In The New Obi-Wan Kenobi Film

Disney has announced they are in the early stages of developing a stand-alone ‘Star Wars’ film focused on the adventures of Jedi master Obi-Wan Kenobi. Here’s what fans can expect to see in the upcoming release.

Man In Center Of Political Spectrum Under Impression He Less Obnoxious

MT. VERNON, OH—Loudly explaining to anyone within earshot that both the left and right were ruining the level of discourse in this country, Jesse Levin, a man firmly in the center of the political spectrum, is under the impression that he is less obnoxious than those with more partisan viewpoints, sources reported Friday.
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New Triple-X Dinosaur Park Opens In Nevada

ELKO, NV—Crowds braved 95-degree heat and throngs of protestors to attend the opening of the Greater Nevada XXX Dinosaur Park Monday, a new adults-only attraction that bills itself as "The Place Where The Extinct Sink The Pink." "You've seen their bones—now see them boning! Triceratops and Bottoms!" according to a television ad for the park currently running after 10 p.m. throughout Nevada and Southern California. Proprietors, who have dubbed the park "Salacious In The Cretaceous," say that visitors "will never think of dinosaurs as cold-blooded again." Paleontologists are calling the park sensationalist and exploitative, but add that anything that gets people interested in science can't be all bad.

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