adBlockCheck

Sports

Refs Let 49ers Put As Many Men On Field As They Want

SEATTLE—Sighing into the microphone as he stood at the 50-yard line of Centurylink Field, NFL referee Gene Steratore ruled during Sunday’s game that the San Francisco 49ers could put as many men on the field as they want.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

‘FanSided’ Ranks All 128 NFL Teams

NEW YORK—As part of its comprehensive professional football coverage in anticipation of the upcoming season, sports news site ‘FanSided’ published an article Tuesday ranking all 128 NFL teams.
End Of Section
  • More News

NFL Punters Lobby Congress For More Fakes

WASHINGTON—High-ranking NFL punters met with members of Congress Tuesday to lobby for legislation that would significantly increase the number of fake punts across the league. "Our elected officials must address the lack of opportunities for punters to rush or pass the ball for much needed first downs," Raiders punter Shane Lechler said before the House Ways and Means Committee. "Unfortunately, many teams do not have the confidence to run these trick plays in the most dire of fourth-down situations. You can fix that. If you earmark $10 million for fakes we could drastically improve training, draw up formations that better exploit unsuspecting defenses, and give desperate teams some kind of hope to keep their drives alive." The coalition of NFL punters said they were adamantly opposed to accepting federal funding for fake punts that involved directly snapping the ball to a running back.

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close