adBlockCheck

NFL Sends Thousands Of Volunteers To Help Clean Up NFC West

Top Headlines

Sports

Report: Gonzaga’s In Washington, Right?

NEW YORK—Ahead of the team’s first-round game against Seton Hall in the NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament, a new report released Thursday revealed that Gonzaga is in Washington state, right?

Teary-Eyed Robert Griffin III Slips On Draft Day Suit Again

WASHINGTON—With several tears streaming down his face as he stood alone in his bedroom’s walk-in closet, sources confirmed Wednesday that former Washington Redskins quarterback Robert Griffin III slipped on the suit he wore to the 2012 NFL Draft.
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next

NFL Sends Thousands Of Volunteers To Help Clean Up NFC West

NEW YORK—The NFL deployed thousands of volunteers Wednesday along with $4.6 million in football supplies to assist in the dilapidated NFC West's rebuilding effort. "This division is a total disaster," said Fred Hudson, co-leader of the NFC West Response Team, who vowed to work every day until the division was restored to tolerable condition following its battering by massive waves of defense and deadly special teams play. "Until the second group of volunteers arrives next week, our main goal is to rebuild all the offensive lines and supply each team with urgently needed quarterbacks. It's not enough, but it's a start." At press time, actor Sean Penn had arrived in the devastated area and was helping the wide receivers of the San Francisco 49ers with their route running.

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close