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Dwight Howard Clearly Doesn’t Know Team’s Name

WASHINGTON—Noting his confused expression and uncertainty while shouting incorrect nicknames throughout the playoff game, sources confirmed Wednesday night that Atlanta Hawks center Dwight Howard clearly does not know his own team’s name.

Man Tries Using Pink 6-Pound Bowling Ball To Great Amusement

WEST ORANGE, NJ—Seemingly knowing full well that the relatively small and light ball was not designed for someone of his size, sources confirmed Tuesday that 25-year-old Darren Foerstner tried using a pink 6-pound bowling ball for one frame, all to the incredible amusement of friends and onlookers at Eagle Rock Lanes bowling alley.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.
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NIT's Exclusive Eight Vie For Coveted Spots In Last Four

CHARLOTTESVILLE, VA—Excitement over college basketball’s National Invitation Tournament reached a fever pitch Tuesday as the teams of the Exclusive Eight prepared to play for the chance to compete in next week’s Last Four at Madison Square Garden. “Reaching the Exclusive Eight is nice, but you know these teams are thinking Last Four,” said ESPN commentator Tim Welsh about the field that remained after half of the Good Sixteen were eliminated over the past two days. “The choosing board set the initial field of 32, we all filled out our winners charts, and so far The Great Big Party has more than lived up to its name. But who will take home the NIT Victory Certificate? Folks, this is what Crazy March is all about.” The 2013 tournament has been especially compelling thanks to the electrifying play of Providence guard and NIT Most Useful Player award frontrunner Bryce Cotton, who many believe has a good chance of one day playing in the ABA.

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