North Korea Claims New Long Range Missile Has Ability To Fly Right Up In The Air, Not Unlike A Bird Or A Fly

Top Headlines

Recent News

‘SportsCenter’ Co-Anchors Clearly Dating

BRISTOL, CT—Saying that the pair could barely take their eyes off one another throughout the hour-long sports news program, ESPN viewers told reporters Friday that it is increasingly clear SportsCenter anchors John Anderson and Matt Barrie are currently dating.

Terrifying Uniformed Bachelorette Party Storms Local Bar

TACOMA, WA—Bursting into the establishment seemingly out of nowhere and overtaking it within a matter of moments, a terrifying uniformed bachelorette party stormed local pub Casey’s Saloon Friday night, onlookers reported.
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next
TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Energy

Internet

North Korea Claims New Long Range Missile Has Ability To Fly Right Up In The Air, Not Unlike A Bird Or A Fly

PYONGYANG, NORTH KOREA—In a provocative and defiant pronouncement aimed at the United States and the U.N., North Korean officials announced Thursday that the country’s latest generation of ballistic missiles possessed the capability to fly right up into the air, much the same as a young bird or a silvery dragonfly might. “Our mighty new Unha missile will go very high, up to the skies above, not at all unlike a long-necked crane rising from the Jiandao marsh,” said vice marshal of the Korean People’s Army Hyon Yong-chol, who went on to liken the weapon’s “terrific fearsomeness” to an angered ox. “Let all nations hear these words: our missile will soar great distances like a migrating duck flying among clouds before returning to the earth with the force of 10,000 pine trees falling. Dire consequences await all who do not heed this warning!” Hyon also confirmed that North Korea would soon test another of its nuclear weapons, which he said was capable of delivering unfathomable levels of death and misery, not unlike the chronic malnutrition that afflicts roughly one-third of his nation’s children.

Next Story