Nostalgic Scientists Rediscover Polio Vaccine

In This Section

Vol 47 Issue 35

Monsanto Corn Under Attack By Superbug

An Iowa entomologist discovered a corn rootworm that has evolved to be resistant to a pesticide produced by a genetically modified corn plant the Monsanto company developed to ward off that very bug.

Circus Train Wreck Not Funny, Investigators Emphasize

ALTOONA, PA—Following the fiery derailment of a 56-car Ringling Bros. circus train Wednesday, hundreds of clowns, somersaulting acrobats, ringmasters on stilts, stampeding giraffes, and monkeys in colorful hats were seen fleeing the accident, which ...
End Of Section
  • More News
TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Productivity

Scientists Posit Theoretical ‘Productive Weekend’

CAMBRIDGE, MA—Challenging long-accepted scientific convention, a group of leading MIT scientists published a report Thursday positing that, under certain rare and specific conditions, a so-called “productive weekend” is theoretically pos...

Comedy

Nostalgic Scientists Rediscover Polio Vaccine

NEW YORK—A half century after Jonas Salk first devised a vaccine for polio, nostalgic researchers at NYU Medical Center rediscovered the “classic” inoculation late Tuesday night, recreating the immunization treatment from a monkey kidney tissue culture determined to be highly evocative of the original. “It was a simpler time back then,” said project leader Dr. Timothy Riordan, who lamented his generation having lost touch with many traditions from the early days of virology. “They just don’t make vaccines like this anymore. There was a real craft to it back then.” At press time, the scientists had shifted their efforts toward finding a way to contain the new deadly and virulent strain of polio they had inadvertently created.

Next Story

Onion Video

Watch More