Nuclear Threat Still 'Very Real,' Says Muhammad Ali

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Vol 29 Issue 23

Special Olympics Fixed

A secret investigation sent shock waves across the sports world yesterday, when it revealed that the Special Olympics, one of the nation's premier annual athletic competitions, is fixed. [image:50101] According to the undercover...

Charlton Heston Gets Serious

HOLLYWOOD, CA—After a quarter century of wacky, lighthearted comedy roles, veteran actor Charlton Heston has accepted a part in a Biblical epic to air on TNT.

New Secretary to Personalize Workspace

MINNEAPOLIS—U.S. Bureau of Departmental Operations secretary Helen Lastrom, 38, is slated to personalize her workplace, a six-foot square cubicle delineated by three grayish-brown office dividers, in the Bureau’s Minneapolis office this week. Her plans in...

Tyrannical African Despot Installs Suggestion Box

KHARTOUM, SUDAN—In a move Secretary General Boutros Boutros-Ghali is hailing as “a major step forward” for democracy in Africa, the United Nations announced Monday that Sudan’s repressive President, General Kolimba Djimasta, has agreed to install a sugges...
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Nuclear Threat Still 'Very Real,' Says Muhammad Ali

LOUISVILLE, KY—Former world heavyweight boxing champ Muhammad Ali spoke out Monday against what he called “the ever-growing threat of thermonuclear war between the United States and the Soviet Union.”  Ali, speaking from his Louisville home, made a personal appeal to Ronald Reagan and Mikhail Gorbachev to settle their differences at the discussion table, not on the field of battle.  “Things have gotten completely out of control,” Ali said. “If we don’t stop this Cold War now, tomorrow there may not be any planet left for the children.”  Ali added that yellow is his favorite color. “It is a very pretty color. It reminds me of daffodils in the springtime.

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