adBlockCheck

Politics

Revelations From Hillary Clinton’s New Memoir

‘What Happened,’ a new memoir detailing the trials and tribulations of Hillary Clinton’s 2016 campaign, was released today, with Clinton supporters and detractors already divided on its contents. Here are some of Hillary’s bombshell revelations:

Joe Arpaio’s Family Surprises Him With Detained Hispanic Motorist

FOUNTAIN HILLS, AZ—In celebration of the dismissal of his conviction for criminal contempt via presidential pardon, Joe Arpaio’s family reportedly sought to surprise the former sheriff Tuesday with a 30-year-old Mexican national whom they detained on suspicion of having entered the country illegally.
End Of Section
  • More News

Black Man Does 8 Years

GO TO FEATURE

Obama Spends Wednesday Doing Some Urgings, Some Callings On

WASHINGTON—During a routine briefing at the White House Wednesday, Press Secretary Jay Carney told reporters President Obama would be occupied throughout the day with numerous urgings and callings on. "The president has a full schedule today, and will spend much of the morning reaffirming his commitments to before tackling five reiteratings this afternoon," said Carney, later noting that, if time permits, Obama would engage in a few comings out against. "In addition to several standings arm in arm with, he'll finish his day with some light unveilings as well as a few statings in no uncertain terms." When asked if the president would have time for a break, Carney said that at 12:30 p.m. Obama would take a brief lunch during which he'd squeeze in as many embracings the values of as he could.

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close