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Refs Let 49ers Put As Many Men On Field As They Want

SEATTLE—Sighing into the microphone as he stood at the 50-yard line of Centurylink Field, NFL referee Gene Steratore ruled during Sunday’s game that the San Francisco 49ers could put as many men on the field as they want.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

‘FanSided’ Ranks All 128 NFL Teams

NEW YORK—As part of its comprehensive professional football coverage in anticipation of the upcoming season, sports news site ‘FanSided’ published an article Tuesday ranking all 128 NFL teams.
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Oklahoma City Thunder Wander Town Aimlessly Looking For Place To Celebrate Big Win

OKLAHOMA CITY—Following their Game 7 victory over the Memphis Grizzlies Sunday, Thunder players spent several hours wandering the streets of Oklahoma City in search of a decent bar or nightclub to celebrate the organization's first Western Conference Finals appearance. "We figured we'd eventually find something, but every place we saw was either closed, pretty empty, or really sad-looking," Thunder guard Russell Westbrook told reporters, adding that Yelp searches on his phone found mostly "nasty cigar lounges and bowling alleys." "You'd think there'd be at least one 24-hour diner or something. You guys just want to go back to the arena and play some more basketball?" After Thunder players spent approximately 45 minutes standing on a street corner asking one another if they were still up for celebrating—and trying to determine if Kevin Durant was serious when he suggested they all drive to Tulsa—the team eventually decided to just go home.

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