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‘Star Wars’ Turns 40

When George Lucas’ Star Wars premiered in 1977, the movie quickly became a phenomenon. On its 40th anniversary, The Onion looks back on the franchise’s defining moments:

Ringo Starr Announces 26th Beatles Album With New Backing Band

‘Moonbeam Sunday’ Slated For Release On June 16

LONDON—Excitedly informing fans that the iconic pop group was back with more original music, Ringo Starr announced Tuesday that on June 16 he would be releasing a 26th Beatles album titled ‘Moonbeam Sunday’ with an all-new backing band.
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Online Recap Of TV Show Attracts 25,000 Readers Who Have Given Up On Life

NEW YORK—The website TVFighter announced Friday that its weekly recap of the show Fringe had received a record-high 25,000 hits from readers who might as well be dead. "After each episode, I like to check the recap just to stay on top of everything, plus the message board is a great way to touch base with other fans," said 32-year old Mike Puleo, who, given his decision to read about a TV program immediately after watching it, has clearly lost his will to live. "I've made some pretty good friends that way. Sometimes me and another guy or two will be on there for hours, commenting back and forth about what's happening with the show. It's one of my favorite things on the Internet." While acknowledging the recaps occasionally contain "serious mistakes" and are not terribly well written, the man whose existence is devoid of any meaning or value of any kind said reading them was "still better than nothing."

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