adBlockCheck

Open-Minded Music Lover Likes All Kinds Of Metal

Top Headlines

Entertainment

Hollywood Stars Overthrown In Bloody C-List Uprising

LOS ANGELES—Unleashing a brutal wave of violence and destruction that has upended the entire power structure of the entertainment industry overnight, the nation’s C-list celebrities have carried out a bloody coup to overthrow the hottest stars in Hollywood, sources reported Tuesday.

Lost Jack London Manuscript, ‘The Doggy,’ Found

RYE, NY—Workers inventorying the estate of a recently deceased Westchester County art dealer earlier this month reportedly stumbled upon a draft of a previously unknown Jack London novel titled The Doggy, and the work is already being hailed by many within the literary world as a masterpiece.
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next

Open-Minded Music Lover Likes All Kinds Of Metal

LOGANSPORT, IN—Area music enthusiast Curt Webber, 22, is completely open to enjoying "all kinds" of metal, the self-described eclectic iconoclast said Monday. "Some people are so narrow-minded and uptight about music, but I'm into a wide variety of bands—everything from Sabbath to Disturbed," Webber said. "Whether it's the old stuff, like vintage Maiden or Priest; new stuff, like Mastodon or the Sword; the virtuosic neoclassicism of DragonForce; the unpolished rawness of, say, Motörhead; a multiplatinum band like the Crüe; an alternative act like Clutch; or just a local outfit like Soldiers of Carnage here in town—power metal, speed metal, glam metal, thrash metal, death metal, nü metal, metal-core, or even Norwegian black metal—it's all music to me, man." Webber conceded that the one musical style he simply cannot abide is rap metal.

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close