adBlockCheck

Sports

Refs Let 49ers Put As Many Men On Field As They Want

SEATTLE—Sighing into the microphone as he stood at the 50-yard line of Centurylink Field, NFL referee Gene Steratore ruled during Sunday’s game that the San Francisco 49ers could put as many men on the field as they want.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

‘FanSided’ Ranks All 128 NFL Teams

NEW YORK—As part of its comprehensive professional football coverage in anticipation of the upcoming season, sports news site ‘FanSided’ published an article Tuesday ranking all 128 NFL teams.
End Of Section
  • More News

Orange Cone Impresses Scouts At NFL Combine

INDIANAPOLIS—Scouts at the 2013 NFL Combine are reportedly abuzz over a 3-inch orange cone whose draft stock is skyrocketing after a standout performance in the first two days of the annual talent showcase. “I don’t think any of us have seen a cone dominate the combine like this since at least ’87,” said Philadelphia Eagles general manager Howie Roseman of the tough, durable SEC cone, which outshined two other highly touted pieces of plastic during the three-cone drill. “This cone is real solid. Great poise out there and just fearless in the middle of the field. Probably too small to be a pylon, but a creative franchise could find a lot of uses for that cone during training camp.”At press time, sources confirmed that the cone was rolling around on the ground in pain after colliding with Florida defensive tackle Sharrif Floyd.

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close