adBlockCheck

Oscar Pistorius Swears Bloody Cricket Bat From Different Murder

Top Headlines

Recent News

End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next
TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Nightlife

Ugh, This A Place Where Bartenders Wear Bow Tie

PITTSBURGH—Saying they should have known from the moment they walked in the unmarked speakeasy entrance and spotted the extensive wood paneling, customers confirmed Friday that, ugh, this is one of those places where the bartenders all wear bow ties.

Oscar Pistorius Swears Bloody Cricket Bat From Different Murder

PRETORIA, SOUTH AFRICA—Facing allegations that he killed girlfriend Reeva Steenkamp during a dispute at his Pretoria mansion last week, track star Oscar Pistorius swore before a judge Monday that a bloodied cricket bat found on his property was in fact used in a completely different murder. “Honest to God, I never used that bat on Reeva—you have to believe me,” the double amputee said of the blood-soaked wooden paddle, claiming he had only ever used it in the 2011 slaying of a Johannesburg prostitute and “a handful” of cricket matches. “Seriously, I haven’t even seen that thing since I killed a hooker with it. To be honest, I forgot I still had it lying around.” According to sources, Pistorius went on to claim that Steenkamp’s skull was already caved in before he shot her four times.

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close