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Sports

Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.
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Penn State Honors Legendary 2012 Legal Team During Halftime

STATE COLLEGE, PA—Recognizing their incredible contributions to both the athletic program and the school as a whole, Penn State University reportedly honored the legendary members of its 2012 legal team during halftime of Saturday’s football game against Ohio State. “Today, we are proud to celebrate those who delivered one of the greatest and most memorable legal performances in school history,” Beaver Stadium PA announcer Dean DeVore said as the group of waving middle-aged attorneys marched out to the 50-yard line to a resounding standing ovation from over 100,000 cheering fans. “These dedicated men and women worked tirelessly in the courtroom and together formed an ironclad defense that will be remembered for generations to come. Just as importantly, throughout their time here, they remained equally committed to the ideals and core values of Penn State. They truly represent all that it means to be a Nittany Lion.” Following the halftime ceremony, Penn State officials unveiled a 15-foot bronze statue of the illustrious litigators outside of the stadium’s Gate C entrance.

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