'People' Magazine Reporter Held Hostage By Timothy Hutton Extremists

Top Headlines

Entertainment

Your Horoscopes – Week of May 1, 2012

ARIES: You will experience unbounded happiness and success in every area of your life this week, unless of course there is something fundamentally and irreversibly wrong with you.

Your Horoscopes — Week Of August 18, 2015

ARIES: Your feeling of impending doom shall come to nothing again this week as the world continues to turn and your life goes on as normal. Perhaps you should consider feeling useless and stupid instead.

Highlights From ‘Go Set A Watchman’

Harper Lee’s buzzed-about new release, Go Set A Watchman, went on sale last week, taking the world by storm with its new investigations of Scout Finch as a grown woman and its divisive portrayal of her father, Atticus Finch, as a racist figure. Here are some highlights from the new book:

Leonardo DiCaprio Agrees To Donate It-Factor To Science

LOS ANGELES—Saying the gift would immeasurably improve their understanding of the ineffable quality that makes certain big-screen stars positively radiate, researchers at the University of California Los Angeles announced Tuesday that A-list actor Leonardo DiCaprio has agreed to donate his it-factor to science.

How Theaters Are Trying To Win Back Moviegoers

The number of Americans who went to the movies hit a 20-year low in 2014, leaving theaters scrambling to find ways to incentivize the public to see new releases on the big screen rather than watch films at home or on the internet. Here are some methods theaters are using to win back audiences and increase box office sales:

Comic-Con Survival Guide

San Diego Comic-Con is expected to draw more than 130,000 fans to Southern California this year to participate in cosplaying, attend panels, go to film screenings, and learn more about their favorite series. Here are some tips for surviving the four-day conference

Your Horoscopes — Week Of July 7, 2014

ARIES: Your belief that nothing can stop you will be tested this week by depression, procrastination, concrete barriers, dysentery, armed gunmen, and the unanimous passage of several laws targeted specifically at stopping you.

Disney Unveils First Virgin Princess

LOS ANGELES—In an effort to better reflect the diverse backgrounds and experiences of their audience, Disney officials this week introduced Lily of Hazelberry, the company’s first virgin princess.

Your Horoscopes — Week Of June 23, 2015

ARIES: The universe, in all its wisdom, has a plan for everyone. Strangely, you’re supposed to be the nun who holds up a distributor cap and winks while the Nazis try to start their car.

Your Horoscopes — Week Of June 9, 2015

ARIES: Your death next week will seem in­explicable until people remember the ill-advised 1985 “cross your heart and hope to die” pledge you made to be best friends with Jenny Bosben.

New Music Festival Just Large Empty Field To Do Drugs In

Declaring the event a rousing success so far, organizers confirmed more than 45,000 people turned out Wednesday for the first annual Cavalcade Folk and Roots Festival, a four-day gathering that consists solely of a big empty field to do drugs in.

Director Seeking Relatively Unknown Actress For Next Affair

LOS ANGELES—Saying that he’s going for a certain look and will know it when he sees it, feature film director Peter Hastings, 52, confirmed to reporters Wednesday that he hopes to find a relatively unknown actress for his next extramarital affair.

Your Horoscopes — Week Of May 26, 2015

ARIES: You’re not sure if your new mousetrap is better, but due to its horrifying use of liquefying blades, the world will beat a path to your door out of sheer morbid curiosity.

Famous Television Finales

The award-winning AMC series Mad Men ended its seven-season run on Sunday night and drew critical acclaim for its final episode, a conclusion that many felt was poignant and satisfying. Here are some other memorable TV finales across the years

Plan For Future Still Involves Drumming For Lifehouse

SOUTH BEND, IN—Fifteen years after first envisioning the path he hoped his professional life would take, local man Brent Gibbs is still planning his future around being the drummer for Los Angeles-based alternative rock band Lifehouse, sources confi...

Fox Revives ‘X-Files’: What To Expect

After months of speculation, Fox has announced that it is bringing back its hit ’90s TV show The X-Files, about a team of FBI special agents investigating unsolved cases about strange and paranormal phenomena, for at least six new episodes...

Your Horoscopes — Week Of March 24, 2015

ARIES: Your belief that everything happens for a reason may remain unshaken in the face of personal tragedy, but you'll certainly be upset when you find out the reason is "to get the Zodiac some chicks." 

Your Horoscopes — Week Of March 10, 2015

ARIES: As long as people don't look too long and the lights aren't too bright, no one will be able to see where they tried to fix your face from what will happen to it this coming Thursday. 

Nation Delighted As Many Famous People In Same Room Together

HOLLYWOOD—Expressing their immense personal satisfaction at the gathering appearing on their television screens, millions of Americans across the country were reportedly delighted Sunday night upon seeing many famous people in the same room together...

Half Of Hollywood Test Group Screened Placebo Film

LOS ANGELES—Saying the methodology helps them ensure unbiased results in their marketing research, studio executives at Paramount Pictures confirmed that during a Hollywood test screening this week they showed half of all theatergoers a placebo film...

Your Horoscopes — Week Of January 6, 2015

ARIES: One of the worst moments of a person's life is when they finally realize that they're mortal and are going to die, especially when it's a person like you who only sees the cement truck at the last second.

A Timeline Of Upcoming Superhero Movies

Following the massive successes of the Spider-Man, Batman, Avengers, and X-Men franchises, studios Marvel and DC Entertainment have announced as many as 40 upcoming superhero movies to be released over the next six years ...
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next
TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Fantasy Sports

Business

'People' Magazine Reporter Held Hostage By Timothy Hutton Extremists

LOS ANGELES—Law enforcement officials confirmed Monday that a journalist on assignment for People magazine has been taken hostage by a violent group of extremists who worship veteran film and television actor Timothy Hutton.

The hostage has reportedly been forced to watch <i>Everybody's All-American</i> on loop for 96 straight hours.

Witnesses at the Sunshine Café said that a heavily armed faction calling itself the "Ordinary People's Front" entered the restaurant shortly before 10 p.m., abducted entertainment reporter Ryan Swanson, and fled the scene in a hail of gunfire.

A videotape made by the Hutton zealots, who are devoted to such motion pictures as French Kiss and The Last Mimzy, arrived at the magazine's headquarters early the next morning.

"If the cowardly dogs at People do not soon pay tribute to the magnificence of character actor Timothy Hutton, then their colleague shall surely die," said a masked OPF member on the tape, which showed a severely beaten Swanson bound and gagged in front of a poster for the 1981 film Taps. "The American media must recognize the unique talents of this Oscar-winning performer, who is also known for his directing. Unless our demands are met, the streets of North Hollywood shall run red with the blood of all nonbelievers."

Hutton

"Praise be the one, true Hutton," the extremist added before firing a semiautomatic weapon wildly into the air.

The terrorist network, which is believed to contain more than a thousand Hutton sleeper cells nationwide, first formed in 1985 following the poor box-office performance of Turk 182!, an event Hutton fanatics still call "the Great Injustice." Since then, the radical organization has been linked to a number of highly coordinated and deadly attacks, including the bombing of an E! television studio in late 2002.

"It is the policy of People magazine not to negotiate with groups such as this," editor-in-chief John Huey said in a statement yesterday. "As concerned as we all are for Ryan and his family, we cannot let fear and intimidation from militant Hutton sects determine the activities of America's favorite celebrity news magazine."

"We made that vow after publishing a six-page spread on Benjamin Bratt in 2001," Huey added.

The abduction of Swanson marks the third incident of Hutton-related violence in the past eight months. The OPF has already claimed responsibility for the torture and hanging of Access Hollywood producer Donald Klein earlier this year, as well as the gory beheading of Us Weekly film critic Sue Banks following her negative review of Secret Window in 2004.

In addition, law enforcement officials believe that a car bombing during the 2000 Golden Globes may have been in retaliation for the award show's failure to recognize Hutton for his work in The General's Daughter.

The unnecessarily tragic results of just one negative 2002 Fashion Police mention.

"These are criminals, plain and simple, and they need to be stopped," said Los Angeles police chief William Bratton, who believes the Hutton extremists train somewhere deep in the hills of Hollywood. "Rest assured, we will hunt down this group, and all groups like it, until every last Hutton operative from Burbank to Studio City is destroyed."

The kidnappers have reportedly sent a list of demands insisting that People magazine print a half-page feature on Hutton's New York restaurant venture P.J. Clarke's, provide them with a suitcase containing $500,000 in unmarked bills, and include the actor "without fail" in the next People.com "Who Looked Hot?" web column.

"If we do not receive what we have asked for, then thousands will be terminated as cruelly and mercilessly as Timothy Hutton's overlooked detective series, The Nero Wolfe Mysteries," read an accompanying note, scrawled in blood.

Moderate Timothy Hutton followers have responded to the attacks with shock and outrage.

"The crazed extremism of a select few should not tarnish the beliefs of those who admire Mr. Hutton for his boyish good looks and offhand charm," Hutton moderate Patricia Cook said. "True followers of The One know that he would never condone the act of murder."

Actor Timothy Hutton is currently filming a new season of the TNT drama Leverage and could not be reached for comment.