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Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.

Keys To The Matchup: Packers vs. Falcons

The NFC Championship Game pits the Atlanta Falcons against the Green Bay Packers for the rare chance to play a meaningful game in Houston. Onion Sports breaks down what each team must do to win.
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Perkins Management Disappointed To See Daunte Culpepper Leave So Soon

ORLANDO, FL—Day manager Gary Campbell of the Perkins restaurant on Conroy Road thanked Daunte Culpepper for his tireless effort, leadership on and off the dining room floor, and dedication to service Tuesday, saying he was saddened to lose a server who had one of the greatest careers in the history of the franchise. "Every Sunday you could count on Daunte to efficiently deliver entrées or find an open table for customers in the face of an oncoming breakfast rush," said Campbell, who was shocked to hear the three-time Perkins employee of the month was retiring. "The fact that he was able to maintain a perfect 158.3 customer satisfaction rating despite working with inexperienced line cooks is incredible. We still believe he can perform at a high level, but respect his decision to walk away from the restaurant game on his own terms." With the departure of Culpepper, Campbell said Perkins would promote journeyman dishwasher-busboy Jeff George from the second shift.

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Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

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