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MLB Unveils Memorial For Runners Stranded On Base

NEW YORK—Solemnly ringing a bell 30 times for each of the teams that lost potential runs this season, Major League Baseball officials unveiled Tuesday a memorial outside league headquarters to commemorate all of the runners who have ever been stranded on base.

Dale Earnhardt Jr. Submits Paperwork For Gas Reimbursement

LONG POND, PA—Hunching over the steering wheel of his idling No. 88 Chevrolet SS to closely inspect the odometer, NASCAR driver Dale Earnhardt Jr. was reportedly in the process of submitting paperwork Monday to reimburse his gas expenses for the month.

A-Rod Donates $25 Million To Be Displayed In Glass Case In Baseball Hall Of Fame

COOPERSTOWN, NY—Ensuring that a treasured piece of the game’s history will be forever preserved for future generations of fans, representatives of the National Baseball Hall of Fame confirmed Friday that retired third baseman Alex Rodriguez recently donated $25 million of his earnings to be displayed inside a glass case in their museum.
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Phil Mickelson Reluctantly Uses Golf Club Kids Made For Father's Day Present

PEBBLE BEACH, CA—In an effort to show appreciation for his Father's Day gift, Phil Mickelson, participating in the final round of the U.S. Open Sunday, reluctantly used a pitching wedge his three children created from a cardboard tube, construction paper, a shoe box, and masking tape. "Oh, boy. I'm never going to get all the glitter out of my golf bag," Mickelson was overheard saying as he stared down a 135-yard shot to the No. 1 green, his children eagerly looking on. "This is going to be a long day." Mickelson then examined the pitching wedge's yarn grip and the grooves drawn on the clubface in magic marker, sighed, set up to the ball, and proceeded to make a 47 on the hole.

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