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Sports

Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Sixth Super Bowl Win Continues To Elude Patriots

HOUSTON—As disappointed players and coaches returned to the locker room following the end of Super Bowl LI, members of the New England Patriots acknowledged to reporters Sunday that the team’s sixth Super Bowl title continues to elude them.

Greatest Super Bowl Halftime Shows

The Super Bowl halftime show is a long tradition as occasionally exciting as the game itself. The Onion takes a look back at the all-time greatest Super Bowl halftime shows.

NFL Loses Rights To ‘Super Bowl’

NEW YORK—After failing to agree to terms for a new licensing agreement before the February 3 deadline, the NFL lost the rights to the term “Super Bowl” on Friday, sources confirmed.
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Pirates GM Unable To Trade Xavier Nady For Alex Rodriguez, Derek Jeter

PITTSBURGH—Despite a series of phone calls to Yankees general manager Brian Cashman made right up to Tuesday's 4 p.m. trade deadline, Pirates GM Dave Littlefield was unable to secure the rights to surefire Hall of Famers Alex Rodriguez and Derek Jeter in exchange for those of rightfielder Xavier Nady. "I don't understand… This was a trade that could have benefited both teams," said Littlefield, frustrated by the Yankees' refusal to consider the trade even after Littlefield sweetened the deal by offering shortstop Jack Wilson for pitcher Mariano Rivera. "We would have gained sorely needed offense in the infield, while the Yankees had a chance to get a little younger and pare payroll at the same time. Plus, they could have bolstered their defense, as Xavier plays first base, too." Littlefield also confirmed that that the St. Louis Cardinals had pulled the plug on a potential Shawn Chacon-for-Albert Pujols deal at the last second.

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