Pirates Starting To Pay Attention To Themselves

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Vol 47 Issue 30

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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Man Commits To New TV Show Just Hours After Getting Out Of 7-Season Series

UNION CITY, NJ—Recommending that he give himself the chance to pause and explore the other options out there, friends of local man Jonathan Gember expressed their concerns to reporters Wednesday that the 29-year-old is already committing to a new television show just hours after getting out of a seven-season-long series.

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Pirates Starting To Pay Attention To Themselves

PITTSBURGH—Finding themselves six games over .500 and vying for first place in the National League Central Division, members of the Pittsburgh Pirates organization are beginning to take notice of the surprisingly competitive Pittsburgh Pirates. "With us in contention this late in the season, I think we've proven that we can't look past ourselves anymore,"Pirates outfielder Andrew McCutchen said Friday, adding that he's become increasingly aware of himself as a force in the middle of the Pirates lineup. "Now when I look on our schedule and see the Pittsburgh Pirates, I know that we'll really need to show up for that game." According to sources, the Pirates are not the only ones beginning to pay attention, as the team’s first winning season in 18 years has become a welcome distraction to locals who would otherwise be worrying about their own existence in Pittsburgh.

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