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Pitt, Aniston To Quietly Separate

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Hollywood Stars Overthrown In Bloody C-List Uprising

LOS ANGELES—Unleashing a brutal wave of violence and destruction that has upended the entire power structure of the entertainment industry overnight, the nation’s C-list celebrities have carried out a bloody coup to overthrow the hottest stars in Hollywood, sources reported Tuesday.
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Pitt, Aniston To Quietly Separate

A rare photograph of the couple, who have chosen to go their separate ways.

LOS ANGELES—Hollywood couple Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston are quietly separating, Pitt's publicist Cindy Guagenti said Friday. "After seven years together, Brad and Jennifer have decided to separate, without a lot of fuss," said Guagenti in a fax quietly forwarded to major media outlets. "They understand that there might be some level of media curiosity, but would appreciate a measure of restraint, as both are modest and reclusive people who treasure their privacy." Out of respect for Pitt and Aniston's feelings, entertainment journalists have agreed not to cover the story, but Star magazine has published rumors that Pitt might have begun an acquaintanceship with the daughter of a well-known Hollywood actor.

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