adBlockCheck

Recent News

Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
End Of Section
  • More News

Pizza Hut Employee Still Hanging Around After Shift

DYERSBURG, TN–Pizza Hut employee Larry Peete, 24, continued to hang around the restaurant for nearly an hour after his shift ended Monday. "He was just hovering around the lobby, making small talk with me and Jeff," said coworker Debbie Rust, who was operating the front register at the time. "Then he wandered over to the prep area and started talking to Duane. I was like, 'Why are you still here, Larry? Your shift is over.'"

More Videos

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close