adBlockCheck

Players Rest Up For Grueling Week Of Super Bowl Hype

Top Headlines

Sports

Report: Gonzaga’s In Washington, Right?

NEW YORK—Ahead of the team’s first-round game against Seton Hall in the NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament, a new report released Thursday revealed that Gonzaga is in Washington state, right?

Teary-Eyed Robert Griffin III Slips On Draft Day Suit Again

WASHINGTON—With several tears streaming down his face as he stood alone in his bedroom’s walk-in closet, sources confirmed Wednesday that former Washington Redskins quarterback Robert Griffin III slipped on the suit he wore to the 2012 NFL Draft.
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next
TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Players Rest Up For Grueling Week Of Super Bowl Hype

NEW ORLEANS—Ahead of the much-anticipated matchup between the Ravens and 49ers, sources confirmed Tuesday that players from both teams have been resting up for an arduous week of intense Super Bowl hype. “It’s been a long season and everyone’s feeling weary, but we all need to be physically and mentally prepared for the fierce publicity ahead,” said Ravens safety Bernard Pollard, adding that seasoned veterans like linebacker Ray Lewis are crucial to showing younger players how to properly handle the relentless interviews, commercial appearances, photo shoots, and social media interaction. “There are times when you don’t think you can keep going, but you just have to dig deep and really push yourself to keep talking about how this is the biggest game of your life and how we’ve all fought so hard to get here. We’ll be getting ready as though this is any other totally overhyped event, but in a lot of ways you can’t totally prepare for such a huge promotional buildup.” When reached for comment, 49ers coach Jim Harbaugh told reporters he is “relishing every moment” of the week-long Super Bowl hype after working his entire life to get to this level of attention.

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close