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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Productivity

Scientists Posit Theoretical ‘Productive Weekend’

CAMBRIDGE, MA—Challenging long-accepted scientific convention, a group of leading MIT scientists published a report Thursday positing that, under certain rare and specific conditions, a so-called “productive weekend” is theoretically pos...

Entertainment

Playoff-Bound Brewers Celebrate By Spraying Mayonnaise In Locker Room

MILWAUKEE—Moments after the Brewers officially clinched the 2008 NL wild card Sunday, CC Sabathia, Prince Fielder, and the rest of the team celebrated by jumping up and down while dousing each other with giant gouts of mayonnaise.

"As soon as Ryan [Braun] hit that home run, I was like, 'Someone better put the mayo on ice,'" said Sabathia, wiping the thick, egg-and-oil based condiment off his face and then licking it off his fingers. Sabathia, who pitched a complete-game four-hitter, was engulfed in the locker room by teammates who poured seven 48-ounce jars of Hellman's mayonnaise over his head, scooping out the contents of each container with spatulas. First baseman Prince Fielder was even more animated during the celebration, at one point taking off his shirt and chugging a half gallon of mayonnaise. However, in an unfortunate incident, shortstop J.J. Hardy forgot to put on his protective goggles and will as a result miss the entire NLDS with mayo eye.

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