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Man Holding Hands With Pregnant Woman Must Have Weird Fetish

RED BANK, NJ—Testing the limits of what even the most progressive onlookers considered publicly acceptable, a man was seen by multiple witnesses Tuesday holding hands with a visibly pregnant woman in what many could only interpret as the expression of a bizarre fetish.
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Police Continue Search For Missing Gunman

'She Left Her Wallet At The Cheesecake Factory,' Authorities Say

KANSAS CITY, MO—According to reports, Kansas City police officers are currently searching for a missing Gunman last seen earlier this afternoon in the parking lot of the Cheesecake Factory on Wyandotte Street. “Apparently, at around 1 p.m. today, a woman named Lisa Gunman dropped her wallet at the Cheesecake Factory,” said officer Mike Sterling, who was in the process of interviewing several eyewitnesses who claimed to have last seen the fleeing Gunman driving away in a 2005 Ford Taurus. “We would like to return it to her.” At press time, police officers were reportedly positioned outside the wanted Gunman’s residence.

This is an update of a previous story: Lone Gunman Enters Crowded Restaurant

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