Pope Died As He Lived: Propped Up For Public Viewing

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Vol 41 Issue 52

Saturn Probe To Be Biggest Story Of The Year

PASADENA, CA—A mere two weeks into the New Year, already what will undoubtedly be the biggest story of the year will have taken place: the upcoming Jan. 14 landing of the Huygens space probe on Titan, Saturn's immense moon.

Well-Rested Bush At The Top Of His Game

CRAWFORD, TX—Fit, trim, confident in his power base, and above all well-rested following a four-week, three-day vacation at his Crawford ranch, President Bush is currently in the prime of his presidential form, pundits say.

April Comes To A Close

WASHINGTON, DC—Experts at the Naval Observatory report that April, as it has every year at this time since records were kept, is progressing to an end.

Deep Fruit Revealed To Be Charles Nelson Reilly

NEW YORK—The identity of Deep Fruit, the source that brought down a studio audience in the Waterblank scandal in 1973, was revealed to be actor and Match Game panelist Charles Nelson Reilly, in an article published in Vanity Fair today.

Tracking Bush's Approval Rating

In 2005, the nation's confidence in President Bush reached an all-time low. What are the events that triggered the most significant changes in his approval rating?
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Pope Died As He Lived: Propped Up For Public Viewing

VATICAN CITY—Pope John Paul II—whose tremendous faith, courage, and ability to be positioned inspired millions of Catholics worldwide—died this week as he lived: propped up for public viewing. "Whether wedged into the glass confines of his custom-made vehicle or placed, often unknowingly, on the balcony of St. Peter's Basilica, Pope John Paul was a stirring symbol of peace, beloved for being put on display before thousands of adoring followers," Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger said Thursday. "While Pope John Paul II, the man, may have passed on, we must never forget what he, with the help of assistants gripping him by the upper arms, stood for." To the faithful, Pope John Paul II was a figurehead who can never be replaced, except by whichever figurehead is chosen to stand in his place.

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