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‘The Princess Bride’ By The Numbers

‘The Princess Bride’ was released 30 years ago today, and it has since become a classic beloved by people of all ages. ‘The Onion’ looks back at ‘The Princess Bride’ 30 years later.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

Infographic: 20 Years Of Netflix

Netflix was founded as an online DVD rental service in 1997 and has since evolved into a subscription-based streaming platform with its own slate of original programming. The Onion looks back at the most important moments in the company’s 20-year history.

Musical The Kind With Number About Putting On A Show

TALLAHASSEE, FL—Noting the increasingly animated choreography and behavior of the characters on stage, sources at the Tallahassee Community Theatre reported Friday that this is apparently the kind of musical with a big number about putting on a show.
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Posthumously Recorded Bob Dylan Album Receives Rave Reviews

LOS ANGELES—Singer-songwriter Bob Dylan’s posthumously recorded 35th studio album Tempest, released Sept. 10, has been enjoying widespread acclaim from top music critics across the country, with many praising the late Dylan’s largely undiminished songwriting skills. “While he may never again match the series of masterworks he recorded in the ’60s and ’70s, when he was alive, Dylan has entered a true late-career renaissance since passing away,” Chicago Tribune music critic Greg Kot wrote in his review of the fourth album Dylan has recorded since his death in 2005. “Dying has lent his voice a certain rough yet poignant gravitas. One can clearly hear how the dead tissue in his vocal cords has deteriorated to the point where there’s almost nothing left. Nothing, that is, except the genius of a master songwriter still in full command of his powers, even seven years after expiring.” While critics have almost unanimously found Dylan himself to be in fine form on the new album, a number of reviews have criticized the playing of his backing band as lifeless.

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Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

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