adBlockCheck

Politics

Bill O’Reilly Tearfully Packs Up Framed Up-Skirt Photos From Desk

NEW YORK—Smiling wistfully as he gazed at the cherished mementos that had sat on his desk for much of the past 20 years, former Fox News commentator Bill O’Reilly reportedly grew teary-eyed Thursday as he packed up the framed up-skirt photos from his work space following his termination by the cable channel.

Donald Trump Jr. Takes Son On Hunting Trip In National Zoo

WASHINGTON—In what he referred to as an important rite of passage for his 8-year-old son, Donald John III, Donald Trump Jr. took his eldest boy to the Smithsonian National Zoological Park for his first-ever hunting trip, sources said Wednesday.
End Of Section
  • More News

Prime Minister Of Norway Gets Laid

OSLO, NORWAY—Prime Minister Jens Stoltenberg got laid on Friday, according to a spokesperson for the Norwegian government. "I am able to confirm that the prime minister did indeed have sex last night, and that he was very pleased to have done so," communication officer Tor Aagaard Borgersen told reporters Saturday during a routine briefing of the Oslo press corps. "Following a meeting with cabinet members on long-term strategies for navigating the eurozone crisis, Mr. Stoltenberg returned home, where, a short time later, he had sex with a woman." Reports from high-ranking officials indicated that after getting laid, the prime minister rested comfortably in his bathrobe and read a book while the woman with whom he had intercourse took a shower.

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close