CORPUS CHRISTI, TX—With her initially stated desire for restored wide-plank floors and a walk-in pantry having already been broadened to any hardwood or laminate flooring and decent kitchen storage space, sources confirmed Friday that aspiring homeowner Chelsea Lange has supplied a progressively vaguer description of her dream home with each new place she reviews in her price range.
LONDONAfter a very public, highly scrutinized courtship, Prince Charles wed his horse of over three decades in a quiet civil ceremony at the Guildhall in Windsor Sunday. "Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth wishes to express her joy that His Royal Highness The Prince Of Wales has, at long last, found true connubial happiness," read a statement released by Buckingham Palace. "Her Majesty is happier still to announce that the new Duchess Of Cornwall possesses a strong carriage, healthy teeth, and an unimpeachable bloodline." Following the ceremony, the reclusive couple retreated to the Birkhall Estate near Balmoral Castle in Scotland, where they celebrated their new union by posing for photographs and going for a brisk trot in the courtyard.