adBlockCheck

Recent News

Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
End Of Section
  • More News

Prince Harry: 'I Killed Taliban-Looking People'

CAMP BASTION, AFGHANISTAN—Completing his four-month tour of duty in Afghanistan, Prince Harry of Wales admitted in interviews this week to having killed a number of “Taliban-looking people” while serving with the British Army Air Corps. “They were definitely dressed pretty Taliban-y, wearing those scarves and robe things, and they were speaking that al-Qaeda-sounding language,” Queen Elizabeth II’s 28-year-old grandson said of the Afghan insurgents he shot and killed while co-piloting an Apache helicopter to provide air support for ground forces. “Who else could it have been? It’s Afghanistan. They’re all over this place in their dirty Taliban homes. Those Taliban kids are hard to hit, by the way—they’re quick.” Upon returning home, Harry, who is third in line to the British throne, reported sighting numerous Taliban insurgents working in shops, running businesses, and walking around London in plain view.

More Videos

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close