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Your Horoscopes — Week Of January 24, 2017

Aquarius No offense, but when got into this business, dealing with empty and meaningless futures like yours sure as hell wasn’t what it had in mind. Pisces Though you’ve been told that dressing up once in a while wouldn’t kill you, the coroner’s report this week will contain evidence to the contrary.

How Trump Plans To ‘Drain The Swamp’

One of Donald Trump’s central presidential campaign promises was to “drain the swamp” by ridding Washington politics of corruption and corporate influence. Here’s how he plans to do it.

Keys To The Matchup: Packers vs. Falcons

The NFC Championship Game pits the Atlanta Falcons against the Green Bay Packers for the rare chance to play a meaningful game in Houston. Onion Sports breaks down what each team must do to win.
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Public Calls For Formation Of Some Sort Of Federal Administration To Manage Emergencies

NEW ORLEANS (Sept. 7)—In the wake of Hurricane Katrina's devastation of the Gulf Coast, Americans are demanding that President Bush sign an executive order that would create a government agency to assist citizens affected by disasters. "Clearly, there is a pressing need for some kind of federal agency to manage these types of emergencies," New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin said. "A federal emergency management administration, if you will." Nagin added that this organization's purpose could dovetail with another federal agency intended to secure the U.S. homeland, if such a thing existed.

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