Quiz: Is Your Weight Keeping You From Getting Drunk?

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Vol 47 Issue 09

MLB Quietly Euthanizes 120 Unnecessary Players

NEW YORK—In what it called a basic housecleaning move, Major League Baseball euthanized 120 players Wednesday, including Tyler Colvin, Nolan Reimold, and 118 others deemed inconsequential or redundant.

Sources Say Atlanta Thrashers 27-28-11

ATLANTA—Sources from within the Atlanta Thrashers organization indicated Thursday that the team currently ranks 11th in the Eastern Conference standings with a record of 27-28-11.

Dead Teenager Remembered For Great Hand Jobs

GOLDSBORO, NC—Friends, classmates, and loved ones gathered last night at a memorial service in the Westside High School gymnasium to celebrate the life of 17-year-old Brooke Belzer, who, before she died tragically in a car accident last week, was beloved for her bright personality and for giving easily the best hand jobs in the school.
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  • Child Visiting Ellis Island Sees Where Grandparents Once Toured

    ELLIS ISLAND, NY—Pausing to imagine the throngs of people who must have arrived with them that day back in 1994, 12-year-old Max Bertrand reportedly spent his visit to Ellis Island this afternoon walking around the same immigrant station his grandparents once toured.

Quiz: Is Your Weight Keeping You From Getting Drunk?

This blog entry is reprinted with permission from the Department of Health and Human Services.

Studies show an individual with a BMI of more than 30 needs six shots of premium grade vodka to feel even mildly buzzed, whereas someone with a BMI between 20 - 25 only needs half of that to lose all of his or her inhibitions. Isn’t that all the reason you need to maintain a healthy weight?

Take this quiz to find out if your weight may be affecting your ability to become intoxicated in a timely manner:

1) Do you usually have to carry one of your skinny friends to the bathroom to vomit before you even feel buzzed?

2) Are you are able to drive perfectly after shot-gunning four Keystones?

3) Do you have to drink an entire bottle of Jagermeister before you want to fight someone?

4) Are you friends unable to lift you for a keg stand?

5) Does a game of beer pong leave you out of breath but not drunk?

If you answered “yes” to any of the questions above, talk with your doctor about a weight-loss program.

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