Ratings Low For NPR Morning Zoo Crew

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Grin Slowly Spreads Across Mom’s Face As Meal Revealed To Contain Healthy Ingredients

‘The Mashed Potatoes Are Actually Made With Cauliflower,’ She Announces

VERONA, WI—Having waited until everyone at the table had finished their dinner Monday, a knowing grin reportedly spread across local mother Angela Hopkins’ face as she announced to her family that the mashed potatoes had in fact been made using cauliflower as a healthier alternative.
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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    The number of Americans who went to the movies hit a 20-year low in 2014, leaving theaters scrambling to find ways to incentivize the public to see new releases on the big screen rather than watch films at home or on the internet. Here are some methods theaters are using to win back audiences and increase box office sales:

Ratings Low For NPR Morning Zoo Crew

WASHINGTON, DC–National Public Radio officials are blaming "inadequate listener support" for the low ratings plaguing the two-month-old NPR Morning Zoo Crew Show. "For some reason, radio listeners have not responded to the zany antics of NPR Zookeepers Alex Chadwick, Jean Cochran and Bob Edwards, whose outrageous pranks have included phoning Harper's editor Lewis Lapham at 6 a.m. and telling him that there's a new collection of Nicholson Baker short stories due out in the fall," NPR programming director James Orbach said. "Then there was the time the Zookeepers actually had Saul Bellow convinced that he'd won the Booker Prize." The NPR Zoo Crew has also gained notoriety for its wacky song parodies, such as a reworked "Prelude In C-Sharp Minor" by Rachmaninoff with lyrics spoofing Noam Chomsky's recent speech before the National Book Club.