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Web Series Reaches 100 Views

A comedic webisode about two roommates became a viral sensation this week after reaching the unprecedented 100 view milestone.

Man In Center Of Political Spectrum Under Impression He Less Obnoxious

MT. VERNON, OH—Loudly explaining to anyone within earshot that both the left and right were ruining the level of discourse in this country, Jesse Levin, a man firmly in the center of the political spectrum, is under the impression that he is less obnoxious than those with more partisan viewpoints, sources reported Friday.

Complex Human Being Reduced To ‘Gutter Guy’ For Purposes Of To-Do List

NASHUA, NH—Taken aback by the cursory and near total diminishment of the living, breathing human being’s multifaceted existence, sources confirmed Monday that a complex individual with rich and intensely personal dreams, ideas, and feelings had been reduced to “gutter guy” for the purposes of an area couple’s to-do list.

Report: Mom Sending You Something

PORTLAND, ME—Stating that she had put it in the mail this morning and that you should keep an eye out for it, your mother notified you Saturday that she was sending you something, reports confirmed.
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Real-Life Stranger On A Train Less Interesting Than Hitchcock Version

PATERSON, NJ—On his commute to work Monday, Patrick Highsmith met a stranger who did not entangle him in a torrid affair, cross-country intrigue, or an elaborate murder plot. "The man made conversation, but it was just boring stuff: work, kids, sports, TV shows," Highsmith said of the bald, heavily jowled man seated next to him on the 8:17 a.m. train. "No suspicious redcaps, no faintly menacing blonde femme fatale, no rack zooms out the window, nothing." Highsmith said he was also unimpressed after spending several weeks spying on his neighbors while confined to a wheelchair.

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