Relationship Definitely Hurtling Toward Something

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City Adds Some Big Concrete Stairs

They’re For Sitting On Or Running Up Or Something

CHICAGO—Noting the structure’s considerable size and prominent location in a busy public park, local residents confirmed Tuesday that the city had installed some big concrete stairs that were probably for sitting on or running up or something like that.
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Relationship Definitely Hurtling Toward Something

GURNEE, IL—After dating only two months, local couple Marcus Evenberg and Tyra Stone told reporters Wednesday their relationship already appeared to be hurtling toward something, though they could not confirm what that might be. “We’ve definitely thrown caution to the wind and are charging headfirst in one direction or another,” said Evenberg, adding that the relationship had the potential to lead, quite soon, to a development of some kind. “This is somehow going to change our lives in a big way, I’m sure. And we’re certainly moving very rapidly toward whatever lies ahead.” Experts agreed the Evenberg-Stone relationship had picked up such speed that the two were likely to lose all control and, as a result, experience strong positive or negative emotions toward each other.