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Politics

Can Trump Follow Through On His Campaign Promises?

President-elect Donald Trump made a variety of lofty promises during his campaign as part of a pledge to “make America great again.” The Onion looks at several of these promises and evaluates whether Trump will be willing or able to follow through on them.

What You Need To Know About The Dakota Access Pipeline

Construction is currently stalled on the Dakota Access Pipeline, which would connect North Dakota’s Bakken Shale development to oil tank farms in Illinois, by protests led by members of the Standing Rock Sioux tribe. The Onion provides answers to key questions about the project.

What Can Americans Expect Under A Trump Presidency?

With two months until the inauguration of Donald Trump, many Americans are wondering what his term will look like and what his administration might accomplish. The Onion answers some common questions about Trump’s upcoming presidency

James Comey Quickly Reopens Clinton Email Investigation For Few More Minutes

‘Nope, Looks Like It’s All Good Here,’ Says FBI Director

WASHINGTON—In a letter addressed to Congress that was quickly followed by a second message retracting the first, FBI director James Comey is said to have briefly reopened the investigation into Hillary Clinton’s emails for several more minutes Friday.

Pollsters Admit They Underestimated Voters’ Adrenal Glands

WASHINGTON—In response to widespread criticism that they had failed to predict Donald Trump’s victory in the 2016 election, analysts from polling organizations around the nation admitted Thursday they had underestimated the influence of voters’ adrenal glands on the presidential race.
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Report: Election May Come Down To Single Candidate

WASHINGTON—According to a report released Monday by the New America Foundation, the race for the presidency could potentially culminate in exclusive victory by a single contender. "Data from the last 55 consecutive presidential elections strongly suggest that, come Nov. 5, one person and one person alone will assume the coveted title president-elect," said political analyst Lawrence O'Donnell, the report's main author. "We had assumed this election would be determined by a number of different factors—Jewish voters in Florida, blue-collar workers in Ohio, or dissatisfaction with the economy, for example—but the data were conclusive: This race is going to boil down to one man." O'Donnell added that the contest could very well hinge upon winning a majority of the electoral college votes apportioned to the 50 states and the District of Columbia.

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