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Listen, Area Boss Gets It

PHILADELPHIA—Readily admitting that everything you’re saying makes a lot of sense, Greenwave Media accounts manager Bryan Mellis confirmed on Wednesday that he totally gets it.

Tide Debuts New Sour Apple Detergent Pods

CINCINNATI—Calling it the perfect choice for consumers looking to add some tartness to their laundry, Procter and Gamble on Tuesday unveiled a new sour apple Tide detergent pod.

The iPhone Turns 10

A decade ago today, Apple released the iPhone and revolutionized the way humans use technology. Here’s a look back at the evolution of the iPhone:

Pros And Cons Of The Gig Economy

Americans are increasingly using on-demand services, both as workers and consumers. Here are the major benefits and drawbacks of the gig economy.

Frontier Airlines Tells Customers To Just Fucking Deal With It

‘You’re Uncomfortable For A Few Hours And Then You Get To Be Somewhere Else,’ Says CEO

DENVER—Noting that some discomfort should be expected while traveling to a faraway place in just a few goddamn hours, officials from ultra-low-cost carrier Frontier Airlines reportedly told customers Thursday to just fucking deal with it.

Helpful Man Saves Woman Effort Of Telling Idea To Boss Herself

ATLANTA—In an unprompted act of generosity from one coworker to another, Spryte Logistics employee Ben Graham reportedly took the initiative to share one of Emily Fehrman’s ideas with their boss on Friday, saving her the time and effort of doing it herself.
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Report: Employers Know Within First 5 Minutes Of Job Interview Whether They Will Murder Applicant

NEW YORK—Confirming years of anecdotal evidence on workplace hiring practices, a new study conducted by psychologists at New York University has found that employers typically know within the first five minutes of a job interview with a prospective employee whether or not they will murder the applicant. “First impressions are everything, and our research shows that no matter how good someone looks on paper, an employer can generally tell almost as soon as a job applicant walks through the door if this is someone they will soon violently kill,” lead researcher Dr. Laura Hollander said of the study, adding that initial factors such as an applicant’s eye contact, facial expression, energy level, and posture are often all that’s needed for employers to know for certain if they are going to slit that person’s throat and stuff their corpse in a supply closet. “One seasoned human resources manager, for example, told us that he typically knows as soon as the first handshake whether he’s going to murder an applicant on the spot or, alternatively, follow the applicant home that evening and bash his or her head in with a rock. Sure, once in a while an applicant can really shine at the end of an interview and overcome an unimpressive start, but in general, people need to be on their game from minute one if they want to prove to prospective employers that they’re someone who deserves to live.” Researchers added that despite the study’s intimidating findings, job applicants can improve their odds of surviving the first interview by preparing responses for a range of potential questions, dressing professionally, and always carrying a concealed weapon in an ankle holster.

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Pros And Cons Of The Gig Economy

Americans are increasingly using on-demand services, both as workers and consumers. Here are the major benefits and drawbacks of the gig economy.

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