adBlockCheck

Entertainment

Most Anticipated Panels At Comic-Con

San Diego Comic-Con kicks off tomorrow, and this year’s schedule is packed with must-see events. Here are the most highly-anticipated panels of Comic-Con 2017.

Biggest Announcements From E3

Each June, E3, or The Electronic Entertainment Expo, hosts game developers showing off their latest products. Here are this year’s most exciting announcements:

‘Star Wars’ Turns 40

When George Lucas’ Star Wars premiered in 1977, the movie quickly became a phenomenon. On its 40th anniversary, The Onion looks back on the franchise’s defining moments:
End Of Section
  • More News

Report: Holy Shit, There Still 50 Minutes Left In Movie

EDGEMONT, PA—Expressing shock that the film he was watching somehow did not yet seem to be reaching its conclusion, area man Tyler Smith, 33, reported Tuesday that, holy shit, there are somehow still 50 minutes left in the movie. “This thing has been going on forever—how could there still be almost an hour left?” said Smith, who had expected the film to be 10 or 15 minutes from finishing when he checked his watch, instead finding that, Jesus Christ, the thing was barely halfway done. “I thought for sure it was wrapping up after that last scene, but we’re not even close. What can even happen for another 50 minutes? Why don’t they just, like, stop right now?” At press time, the movie had finally concluded, and a visibly moved Smith told reporters that, fucking hell, he just wanted to cry.

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close