Report: Imagine How Good It Would Feel To Just Crawl Back Into Bed Right Now

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Area Dad Thinks Refs Should Just Let Them Play Football

DOYLESTOWN, PA—Facetiously questioning how the game had suddenly become a non-contact sport, local father Aaron Harper confirmed his belief Thursday that referees officiating a Thanksgiving game between the Philadelphia Eagles and Detroit Lions should just let them play football out there.
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Report: Imagine How Good It Would Feel To Just Crawl Back Into Bed Right Now

WASHINGTON—Citing its seductive warmth and utter remove from the demands and stresses of your daily life, a new study released today from the Pew Research Center has found that, man, wouldn’t it be incredible to just crawl back under the covers of your big, soft bed at this exact moment and just stay there for hours and hours? “Picture yourself cocooned in that fluffy comforter in your quiet, darkened bedroom, far away from everything and everyone surrounding you,” read the report in part, adding that “you need to close your eyes right now, at your desk or wherever you are, and really let yourself go to this place for a moment.” “Just sink into that pillow and let yourself drift off to sleep in total contentment. That’s it. That’s a baby. Shh. Don’t think. Just let your imagination transport you.” The report went on to further indicate how wonderful it would be, in fact, if you could close your eyes, fall into a deep, peaceful slumber, and never wake up again.