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What To Watch For In The New Obi-Wan Kenobi Film

Disney has announced they are in the early stages of developing a stand-alone ‘Star Wars’ film focused on the adventures of Jedi master Obi-Wan Kenobi. Here’s what fans can expect to see in the upcoming release.

Man In Center Of Political Spectrum Under Impression He Less Obnoxious

MT. VERNON, OH—Loudly explaining to anyone within earshot that both the left and right were ruining the level of discourse in this country, Jesse Levin, a man firmly in the center of the political spectrum, is under the impression that he is less obnoxious than those with more partisan viewpoints, sources reported Friday.
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Report: Majority Of Pay Phone Conversations Begin, End In Tears

WASHINGTON—A new study by the Federal Communications Commission has determined that as many as 81 percent of all calls made over pay phones start and conclude with uncontrollable sobbing. The report, published Monday, surveyed a wide sample of public telephone conversations, nearly all of which began with the phrase "Please don't hang up, oh God," and devolved into unrestrained bawling on the part of one or both participants. The FCC's report also confirmed that the remaining 19 percent of pay phone calls are wrong numbers caused by frantically misdialing one's parole officer, ex-girlfriend, bookie, or AA sponsor.

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