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A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:

Man Either Sick Or Just At End Of Workday

CINCINNATI—Overwhelmed by a wave of fatigue, local man Will Markowski told reporters Tuesday that he was uncertain whether he was getting sick or if it was just the end of a normal workday.
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Report:     % Of Americans Suffer From Synesthesia

BALTIMORE—A new report from leading neurologists at Johns Hopkins University reveals that as many as      percent of Americans have      or more symptoms of synesthesia. “Our conclusion is that the number of U.S. synesthesia patients is      times as high as at any point since the condition was first identified,” said study head Dr. Phillip Waggoner, announcing the findings of the in-depth     -year study. “It could take      decades to unravel the mysteries of synesthesia and develop an effective treatment.” Waggoner concluded by pleading with the government for more funding so that people afflicted with the medical enigma can live like the other percent of Americans.

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