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What You Need To Know About Last Night’s Oscars Debacle

Many viewers were left wondering about the sequence of events that led to the initial erroneous declaration of ‘La La Land’ as the Best Picture winner at the Academy Awards Sunday instead of the real winner, ‘Moonlight’. The Onion breaks down what you need to know about this fiasco.

Brad Pitt Sidelined 6 To 8 Weeks With Red Carpet Toe

LOS ANGELES—Saying doctors strongly recommended that he stay off the injured foot, representatives for Brad Pitt confirmed to reporters Sunday that the actor was sidelined six to eight weeks with a case of red carpet toe.

The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:
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Report: Watching Episode of 'Downton Abbey' Counts As Reading Book

WASHINGTON—According to a report from the U.S. Department of Education released Thursday, watching a single episode of the British TV series Downton Abbey is the cultural and educational equivalent of reading an entire book. "It's a period piece with British accents and drama that hinges on each character's place within an aristocratic peerage system, so needless to say, viewing one show from beginning to end is basically the same as reading a book," Education Secretary Arne Duncan said. "Also you really have to pay attention to the storylines, so it's also like reading in that respect. And it's not as if you can stop watching Downton Abbey for a while, come back to it, and remember exactly what's going on. You'd probably have to start over from the very beginning, just like you do with a book." Duncan then excused himself from the press conference so he could go home and watch a couple books before he went to bed.

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