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Best Sports Video Games Of All Time

With titles such as ‘FIFA 17’ and ’NBA 2K17’ expected to be popular gifts this holiday season, Onion Sports looks back on some of the best sports video games of all time.

Strongside/Weakside: Ezekiel Elliott

After becoming only the third player in NFL history to rush for 1,000 yards in his first nine games, Dallas Cowboys rookie running back Ezekiel Elliott is an early candidate for league MVP. Is he any good?

Strongside/Weakside: Theo Epstein

In just five seasons, Chicago Cubs president of baseball operations Theo Epstein assembled a team that is competing for the franchise’s first World Series title since 1908. Is he any good?

Jumbotron Really Trying To Push New Third-Down Cheer On Fans

SAN DIEGO—Noting that the phrase had appeared in large blue letters during each of the team’s offensive drives, sources at Qualcomm Stadium confirmed Friday that the Jumbotron was trying really hard to push a new third-down cheer on San Diego Chargers fans.

Strongside/Weakside: Kris Bryant

By leading the Chicago Cubs in hits and home runs en route to their second straight playoff appearance, Kris Bryant has placed himself in the running for the National League MVP. Is he any good?

Rest Of Nation To Penn State: ‘Something Is Very Wrong With All Of You’

WASHINGTON—Stating they felt deeply unnerved by the community’s unwavering and impassioned defense of a football program and administration that enabled child sexual abuse over the course of several decades, the rest of the country informed Penn State University Friday that there is clearly something very wrong with all of them.

Strongside/Weakside: Lamar Jackson

After passing for eight touchdowns and rushing for another 10 in just the first three weeks of the season, Louisville Cardinals sophomore quarterback Lamar Jackson has quickly become the frontrunner to win the Heisman Trophy. Is he any good?
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Report: Waving Objects Behind Basket Has Only Resulted In 3 Missed Free Throws In NBA History

DURHAM, NC—A new study published on fan behavior this week revealed that the common practice of waving objects behind the basket to distract free throw shooters has succeeded only three times in the NBA’s 67-year history. “It doesn’t matter if the objects are inflatable plastic noodles, signs that say ‘Miss It,’ or cardboard cutouts of players—waving them around almost never has any effect on the free throw shooter whatsoever,” said the study’s lead author Andrew Townsend, noting that the only three times the strategy worked were St. Louis Hawks point guard Jack McMahon’s second missed free throw against the Celtics on March 2, 1957; Philadelphia 76ers center Darryl Dawkins’ first missed free throw in Game 2 of the 1980 Eastern Conference Finals; and Detroit Pistons forward Tayshaun Prince’s fourth failed attempt against the Chicago Bulls on January 6, 2007. “These are professional athletes we’re talking about. They know how to deal with this stuff. They’re not going to miss just because you’re frantically shaking something.” The study did confirm, however, that shouting “brick” just before a free throw causes players’ accuracy to drop by 20 to 30 percentage points.

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