Report: You Know You Are A Fucking Idiot, Right?

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Vol 47 Issue 50

Those We Lost In 2011

Once again, the world experienced several million deaths over the course of a year. Five of those people who died were famous.

2011: Politics

Party brinksmanship in Congress has led to the government nearly shutting down on multiple occasions this year.
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Comfort

  • Entire Room Mentally Shaving Man's Facial Hair

    WHITE PLAINS, NY—Stunned and visibly offended by the sheer volume of facial hair visible before them, every single customer at local diner Hubbard's this morning was reportedly eyeing 28-year-old fellow patron David Kellerman and mentally shaving of...

Report: You Know You Are A Fucking Idiot, Right?

AMHERST, MA—According to a study published Friday by experts who can tell just by looking at you, you have got to be aware that you're a fucking idiot. "You know that, right?" the report read in part, going on to stress that you really ought to see what everyone else sees when they look at your stupid face. "There's really no way you couldn't know, but then again, you're such a giant dumbass that anything's possible." The report concluded that, seriously, if you don't realize it, you'd better get a fucking clue.

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