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Best Sports Video Games Of All Time

With titles such as ‘FIFA 17’ and ’NBA 2K17’ expected to be popular gifts this holiday season, Onion Sports looks back on some of the best sports video games of all time.

Can Trump Follow Through On His Campaign Promises?

President-elect Donald Trump made a variety of lofty promises during his campaign as part of a pledge to “make America great again.” The Onion looks at several of these promises and evaluates whether Trump will be willing or able to follow through on them.

Being A Mom Was The Best Four Years Of My Life!

As I get older, I find myself reflecting on my life more often and marveling at what an amazing journey it’s been. I’ve made tons of great friends, been to magnificent places all over the world, and learned so many important things about myself along the way. But if I’m being honest, there’s one period of my life that stands out from all the rest: those four incredible years when I was a mom.
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Reporter For High School Newspaper Most Professional Journalist In Nation

YAKIMA, WA—According to sources, sophomore Melanie Finkelstein, a reporter for Yakima High School's Eagle Eye student newspaper, is, as of Tuesday, the most competent and professional journalist in the nation. "I just want everyone on campus to know what's going on," said the student, who when reporting on various Yakima High events and activities attributes all details and assertions, runs quotes by sources before publishing them, and avoids sensationalism. "I triple-check my facts and then take out anything that looks like an opinion from me—just basic journalism stuff, really." Finklestern, 15, who with her short, cropped hair and tomboyish clothing is probably a lesbian, said that while she enjoyed writing for the student paper, she doubted she was good enough to ever do it for a living.

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