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Social Media Rock Star Makes $28,000 Per Year

Widely regarded as one of the online world’s brightest personalities, sources confirmed Friday that famed 28-year-old social media rock star Ryan Wasserman, better known as @RWthinks by his legions of passionate fans, makes roughly $28,000 per year.

Ringo Starr Announces 26th Beatles Album With New Backing Band

‘Moonbeam Sunday’ Slated For Release On June 16

LONDON—Excitedly informing fans that the iconic pop group was back with more original music, Ringo Starr announced Tuesday that on June 16 he would be releasing a 26th Beatles album titled ‘Moonbeam Sunday’ with an all-new backing band.
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R.L. Stine Reveals Slappy From Night Of The Living Dummy Was Gay

NEW YORK—Children's author R.L. Stine broke his long-held media silence Monday to announce that Slappy, the evil ventriloquist's dummy from the Goosebumps Night Of The Living Dummy trilogy, was a homosexual.

"This is not completely unexpected," said Goosebumps fan Ned Kosorowski, who has long speculated that the fictional wooden doll preferred the company of men, and has even written fan fiction describing graphic sexual encounters between Slappy and Amy's father. "Slappy's constant attempts to break out of the closet that Amy stores him in at night clearly represent his struggle with homosexuality—as well as his deep-seated, repressed feelings for [rival ventriloquist's dummy] Mr. Wood."

Stine refused to address rumors regarding the possibility that Greg from Say Cheese And Die—Again! suffers from bipolar disorder.

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